Boredom alert! Come play with me!

I'm bored. Why is everything so boring today? Work has been indescribably busy, kids started school and all the mess that goes with that, and last night was the first night in a week I had more than 5 hours of sleep, so naturally I slept too much and now I am still tired. Ooh, but I just realized that the ten anniversary of my Livejournal is this month. Holy cow, where does the time go?

But I am still bored.

So let's play a game or do a meme or something! Entertain me! Let's do one of those meme's where you post a short section from 5 stories. Don't care if your actively working on them or not, just give me a funny or angsty or smutty little tidbit to give me joy! Give me fragments from the stories you've abandoned, give me your next big hit! Any fandom, any pairing, just hit it!

To be fair, I'll play too:

( Beneath this cut is five tidbits from stories I may...or may not...be working on )